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The Dark Side of Assisted Living Nobody Talks About

Assisted living residents can wake up when they choose and design their days around community activities, and the care they need. Many communities offer activities that are adapted for every physical ability level.

But what’s life like in an assisted living community really look like?

Daily Routines

When it comes to assisted living, schedules are generally relaxed. While there are scheduled activities, residents are free to wake up when they want and design their days around the community’s events, especially those that do not require the intensive medical care of a nursing home. Caregivers will assist with any tasks they need help with — like taking medication, bathing or dressing — and there’s always someone available to respond to unscheduled needs.

Mornings typically start with a nutritious breakfast in the dining room, where caregivers may be on hand to provide assistance. After breakfast, seniors can engage in a variety of social engagement activities designed to promote cognitive abilities and foster a sense of well-being. These activities may include physical exercises, arts and crafts sessions or discussions.

After lunch, many seniors will choose to take a nap or spend the afternoon visiting friends or exploring hobbies. Others will go to one of the community’s common rooms for entertainment, or they may prefer to read a book in their apartment or catch up on correspondence and phone calls using the community’s internet access.

When touring facilities, make sure to talk with everyone you encounter, from administrators and managers to the housekeeping and program and activities staff. Getting to know the staff members you’ll be working with closely will give you a good feel for the culture of the community and how much you and your loved ones will be supported and valued as residents.

Meals

It’s a common joke: Your sister’s assisted living community serves “the worst shit ever!” But the truth is, most communities have made great strides in accommodating the preferences of baby boomers and other seniors. From organic and vegetarian diets to gluten-free foods, most ALs have menu options that make it easier for you to follow your own dietary requirements while still enjoying a nutritious meal each day.

In addition to the main dining room, many communities offer cafes and bistros that give you more autonomy over meal times so you can grab a sandwich or cup of coffee when you feel like it. You can also ask about having meals delivered to your apartment if you prefer. But be sure you understand whether this service is included in your monthly fee or if there’s an additional charge.

When it comes to dining, the goal is to help you feel at home during each and every meal. Enjoy delicious food prepared by talented chefs that’s good for your dietary health needs—and that tastes just as great. Plus, you’ll get to share each meal with friends in elegant dining rooms that encourage conversations.

Many communities will provide you with printed or digital (via app or website) menus in advance so you can plan ahead and know exactly what to expect. Some may even send you a reminder when it’s time for your next meal.

Socialization

Assisted living communities emphasize socialization through regularly scheduled activities designed with the residents’ interests in mind. This makes it easier for seniors to meet other residents with similar interests and form new friendships. However, it’s also possible for seniors to enjoy socialization outside of planned activities as well. Communities often provide transportation services to local events and shopping centers. This helps maintain a connection to the community and is beneficial for seniors who may have a difficult time getting around without assistance.

Even if your loved one initially resists the idea of socializing with others, you can help them get used to their new surroundings by encouraging them to attend scheduled events and to make friends with other residents. Once they feel comfortable, it’s important that seniors stay engaged with their peers to avoid depression, anxiety and cognitive decline.

Take note of the types of activities that are offered and how many other residents seem to be participating. Is there a group of “grumpy old men” who gather in the common room to complain and share stories? Maybe your dad would join them. You might also want to pay attention to the way staff interact with the residents. Do they greet them by name and engage in warm conversations? If so, this is a good sign that the facility takes a positive approach to senior care. Providing an emotionally supportive environment is just as important as providing a safe and secure home for your loved one.

Activities

If you’re considering assisted living for your loved one, it’s important to understand the daily schedule and activities available. It’s also helpful to take tours of a few different communities and compare them. If possible, bring along family members to tour facilities and chat with residents so everyone gets an accurate view of what life is like in assisted living.

Assisted living community calendars often include an array of exciting indoor and outdoor events. These activities promote physical health, mental stimulation and wellness, social connections and a sense of belonging.

In addition to regular gym classes, most assisted living communities offer recreational options like movie nights and arts and crafts. Most will also have a pool, walking paths and gardens where your loved ones can enjoy the outdoors.

Meaningful social engagement is a top priority for most communities, as isolation can lead to depression or other health issues. Many older adults who move into assisted living find that they plug in quickly, making new friends and knowing staff members by name.

In the evening, your loved one can retire to their apartment or common area to visit with friends, play games or watch a movie. If they need help preparing for bed, caregivers are there to assist. Then, they can go to sleep knowing that all of their needs will be taken care of in the morning. The rest of their day is free to spend however they’d like.

Personal Care

A big part of the job is forming close bonds with residents and bringing a sense of community into their lives. Unlike working in a medical facility, where patients come and go every few days, staff members get to work with the same people over the long-term. This allows them to really get to know their residents, listen to their stories and share a little bit of themselves too.

Assisted living communities offer a wide range of amenities, which may include libraries and game rooms, fitness centers and outdoor spaces. Some even host guest lecturers or professors to speak on topics like art history or flower arranging. They may also provide computer rooms and personal tablets to help seniors develop technical skills. To reduce the risk of falls, these communities often feature low-threshold doors and hallway hand railings, as well as specially designed walk-in showers and grab bars in bathrooms.

If your loved one is considering transitioning into an assisted living or memory care facility, it’s important to have a thorough assessment done by healthcare professionals to determine the level of care they will need. Once you have a clear understanding of their health and daily living needs, it’s time to start touring options. If possible, take as many tours as you can and ask a lot of questions. It’s also a good idea to bring a friend or family member along to tour facilities and compare notes.

Safety

A big reason family members seek out assisted living for their loved ones is because they want them to be safe and secure. This doesn’t just mean a place to live free from hazards like slippery floors or poorly lit areas that could easily cause a fall, but also a clear evacuation plan should a fire occur in the facility. Additionally, facilities should have working smoke detectors, sprinklers and fire extinguishers that are regularly inspected by safety professionals to ensure they function as intended.

Staff at an assisted living community should be happy and well-trained, allowing them to focus on providing the best possible care for residents. Those who are overworked or tired are more likely to make mistakes that can put the health and wellbeing of residents at risk. To minimize this risk, facilities should have ample staffing on each shift and have systems in place to monitor staff levels.

Assisted living communities are designed to provide a home-like atmosphere where residents can enjoy themselves in a safe and comfortable environment. Many offer a variety of activities and events that promote physical health, mental stimulation and wellness, social connections, and a sense of purpose. Residents can also expect to receive up to three meals a day, assistance with daily routines like bathing and eating, and 24-hour on-site supervision and security. Depending on the facility, some may offer additional services like on-site physical therapy and transportation assistance.